The Most Wonderful (or Anxious) Time of the Year: Navigating Social Anxiety During the Holiday Season

Family dinners, friend get-togethers, work holiday parties, this time of year our calendars are often filled with social events. While some look forward to this together-time, it may cause significant anxiety for others.  If you have a family member who dreads holiday gatherings, please don’t assume they’re the Grinch; they may be dealing with social anxiety.  Social anxiety, or social phobia, is typically characterized by fear or worry surrounding social situations in which there is a possibility of being judged or scrutinized. Individuals who struggle with this may avoid, or endure with high anxiety, situations like meeting new people, eating in front of others (or talking with relatives they haven’t seen all year.)

How to get through the holidays or support a loved one

• Include a festive activity – baking, ice skating, holiday movies. This provides you or your loved one with good points for conversation and allows for time spent doing something other than just sitting across the table and talking. 
• Take breaks to “recharge” your social battery or respect your loved one’s decision to do so.
• Be supportive and empathetic, but don’t enable your loved one. Enabling can look like talking for your loved one in social situations or not introducing them to new people. This may feel helpful in the moment to lower their anxiety but will only perpetuate their fear long-term. 
• Use holiday gatherings as an opportunity to challenge yourself. Want to feel more confident next holiday season? The time is now to work on facing your fears. Accept that you may feel embarrassed or highly anxious. Pack your anxiety with you (and maybe a few Tupperware’s for those well-deserved leftovers.) These feelings are temporary and probably worth the relief and success down the road.

Often with social anxiety, people struggle with overanalyzing social interactions after the fact. Be proud of yourself or your loved one just for showing up even if it didn’t go “perfectly.” Goodbye holiday anxiety, see you next year (or maybe not 😉) .